My One Change That Made a Difference: How I Conquered Post-Work Tension Through an Surprising Discovery in the Attic

I frequently become like a coiled spring after work. Tension grips my shoulders, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Typically, the sound of my laptop lid slamming shut would be followed by the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Then, several months back, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder up in the loft. I idly blew into it, immediately transported back to the days when it drove me crazy – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

Instead of throwing it away, I brought it downstairs, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, a typical young child could learn it quickly, yet for a stressed, impatient, musically-challenged adult, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son questioned my actions (and begged me to quit), but I persevered – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. Forgetting notes easily meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breath calmed, I was focused, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Today, several months later, I can handle other children’s songs and a passable Ode to Joy. Sure, my rhythm is off, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but for me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, as well as my son’s.

I try to pick up my recorder every evening after work before I do anything else, and in those 20 or so minutes, I am in my own little world. Afterward, I feel totally energised and uplifted.

My friends find it amusing, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is invaluable at my time of life. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.